My friends, I must begin by saying, this blog entry is not about relationship commitment issues. But since I mentioned it, it does seem in the dating world that people are either wayyyyy too committed or not nearly enough.
This entry is to help deal with General Issues with Commitment- as in, can’t make a decision or can’t stick with a decision, kind of people.
The problem is this-As American’s, we have wayyy too many options for where to live, who to date, what to believe, how to spend our money, what to read, where to work, HOW TO SPEND OUR TIME…. The list could go on longer than a years worth of dull movies.
Many of us would agree, myself leading the pack, that committing is hard not because we are afraid of success, but because we all want to be happy, and we don’t know exactly which path will bring us the greatest happiness.Truthfully, I can barely commit to finishing a book because I don’t know if it will be the “perfect book for me.” There aren’t many names for this collective feeling of non-commitment, but I like to think of it as Societal ADD, or simply Commitment Issues.
If you’ve ever felt this way, read on for some insight on How To Deal with commitment issues in order to help you obtain your greatest happiness. Remember this, committing to something does not mean that you will be stuck with your decision forever, it only means that you are signing up for a meaningful experience. At least with commitment as opposed to non-commitment, you are doing something with a degree of involvement instead of wading in the tepid, and eventually murky, pool of options.
How to Make a Commitment and Stick to it
Step 1- Think about your priorities. Do you want a gorgeous spouse and eventually a big happy family? Do you want an awesome career and then potentially the family? Do you want to travel? Do you want to help others in a big way, such as by being a missionary? Newsflash-There are TONS of options. The take away point from this step is to PRIORITIZE. Think about what is most important and the few things following closely behind in 2nd and 3rd, and work towards obtaining those priorities, with special attention given to the top priority. Just think about what gives you fulfillment, and work your commitments around doing the things that fulfill you.
Step 2- Write those priorities down. Put them in a place where you can see them and work towards achieving your goal. Remember, this is just a commitment, not a stone carving in the history books.
Step 3- Visualize yourself in the life that you have committed to achieving. If you want this commitment to come true (which you do, because it’s better than just waiting for something to happen) then you need to imagine yourself becoming what you have committed to.
Step 4- WHEN IN DOUBT, remember all the things you’ve committed to in the past. Think about the benefits you have gained from committing, such as learning a new skill, doing great at work, bettering yourself. When you are committed, your head is in the game, as opposed to staring off into space- which is what causes some people to miss our on their lives.
Step 5- Once you’ve obtained your goal, there’s always a million more things to either think about or to actually commit to. Only you can choose which option is best for you. In the meantime, if you’re having a hard time choosing your next path, you can always refer to these 5 steps.
Written by your friend, Rachel Goodman; Blogger, Server, and reformed Commitophobe.